“Your family is a microcosm of the world. All the world’s problems present themselves in your family system. This is your training ground for having a greater influence in life and for handling the world at large. You will experience both acceptance and rejection there. You will have a balance of war and peace. You will be built up and crushed. This is as it is supposed to be. You will learn everything there that you need to handle the rest of your life. You will learn how to tackle ever-greater issues. You will learn how to deal with ever increasing challenges. You will learn how to influence, communicate, manipulate and how to fight for what is important to you. You will learn about who you are in relation to others.
Everyone feels strong emotions - it is a normal, natural part of life. But if you are not aware of what your emotions are, how to deal with them, what they mean, they can seem quite scary. This lovely little film by Julie Bayer Salzman and Josh Salzman explores with children what emotions are and how they feel and them encourages kids to use breathing to get in touch with themselves and allow the emotion to pass naturally. A great film both for kids and parents! If you've been one of my clients or attended one of my talks, you'll know that I talk a lot about the conditioned mind - how we end up doing most things, including the way that we think, on autopilot. This video is such a brilliant demonstration of this and why you need repetition to change the way that you think or your behaviour. Our minds are full of programs and algorithms that basically run our lives. If you want to know how to dig in there and change these, then give me a call! I came across this video recently and while it is a little frightening to contemplate, I think it is worth watching in order to adapt the way that we speak to kids about talking to or going off with strangers. We think that we have had the chat, that our kids are safe, and that we've done what needs to be done. This social experiment proves otherwise. We need to expand on these stranger danger talks with our kids if we really want them to understand how to stay safe. Here are some of my parenting quotes from my social media platforms over the past few months. May they bring you inspiration and reassurance!
This clip from the National Geographic series "Brain Games" shows just how much information we delete, distort, or generalise as we take in the world. What we unconsciously decide to delete, distort, or generalise is based on our values, beliefs, emotional baggage and needs - what we have told our minds is important or not important. This is why it is essential to know what your kids' values are - once you link something to what is important to them, it becomes part of that spotlight of attention. A colleague of mine sent me this incredible handout from the NSPCC in the UK to help parents to talk to their kids about stranger danger. We're all aware of sexual abuse, but sometimes don't know how to handle this subject matter with our kids in a way that won't scare them or give them more information than they are ready for. This little handout covers all of that in a fun, easy way. Some really great advice for parents who are divorcing (or thinking about divorce) on what you can do to lessen the impact on your kids. Divorce does not have to damage your children forever and there are simple, definable things that you can do to make sure that your kids come out ok on the other side. Some fascinating research into the effects of too much TV (and particularly fast paced TV) on the early development of children. Dimitri Christakis looks at the importance of playing with and reading to our kids and avoiding long hours in front of the box and how this impacts their ability to learn and concentrate later in life. If you have kids under 3 years-old this is a must watch! |